falling face forward into fall

I’ve been a little down recently, as many of you kind people have noticed. I forget about who reads this thing until I bump into a neighbor who says, you’ve been having a hard time lately, Lisa. Huh? Oh, yes. You read the blog. Yeah, it’s been kind of a crummy summer.

Between my mom going through emergency surgery (twice), the death of a family friend (suicide), unfortunate health issues and some unexpected fall outs with a couple of dear friends, I'm ready to say so long, summer. I'll gratefully welcome you back next year but for now, I need a break.

Unfortunately, as we all know, once you admit to yourself that you’re unhappy or dissatisfied, it doesn’t go away. You can push it back for a few weeks- even a few months- and then all of a sudden, bam! It’s going to come back. And exponentially worse than ever before.

So today, I finally did what I should have done, weeks ago. I called my mom and told her everything. Well, almost everything. I don’t want to send her back to the hospital. Even though we talk all the time, we didn’t really talk until today. I’d been thinking a lot about her, and I’ve been in a truth-telling frame of mind for a week or so… it was time to go straight to the source, the real deal.

We talked for a while and she told me about a number of different odds and ends happening in my family that made me feel a little better about my situation. I guess the point was that a lot of other people have it worse than me. I know that. But it helps when my mom says it to me.

Also, she told me not to feel guilty about the delay in my move west. As long as I can make it out there by next year, I’m still in pretty good shape, apparently. That was a huge relief. There’s something just really satisfying about crying on the phone when the other person loves you unconditionally. You know, you just know, that there’s a bit of light peeping around the end of the tunnel. It helped. A lot.

And work-wise, things couldn’t be better. For everything else, we'll just have to see. But so far, I'm feeling good about fall; hayrides, football, haunted houses and pumpkin patches- it's always been my favorite time of year. I welcome today, the first day of fall, with open arms- excited about new beginnings, ready to leave old hurts behind. It feels good.

Comments

Kevin LeMaster said…
I welcome today, the first day of fall, with open arms- excited about new beginnings, ready to leave old hurts behind. It feels good.

That's the spirit! Keep your chin up, Lisa.
Lisa said…
Thanks Kevin! I'm doing well...

And I'll have some fun/funny posts to prove it soon.

:)
Kevin LeMaster said…
I welcome today, the first day of fall, with open arms- excited about new beginnings, ready to leave old hurts behind. It feels good.

That's the spirit! Keep your chin up, Lisa.
Lisa said…
Thanks Kevin! I'm doing well...

And I'll have some fun/funny posts to prove it soon.

:)

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