Sunday, February 21, 2010

the cake

I’m standing in the oversized grocery department store trying to explain my request for a cake for my parents’ wedding anniversary party to a very bored bakery clerk. Who is already aggravated because I had to have her paged to help me.

“I just want a simple sheet cake. With these photos scanned on the top.”

“That’s gonna look kinda plain. You sure you don’t want roses in the corners?”

“No roses. Just the photos and the inscription across the top.”

“How about border? We can put a border around each photo and around the edge of the cake.”

“No thank you,” I said. Grimacing at the fat frosting roses on every square inch of every cake in the joint. “I just want it to be simple.”

“It’s not gonna look very good.”

Capitulating for a minute, I agreed to some rainbow sprinkles, then quickly changed my mind. “I just… I want it to… look really nice. You know. Nothing… Nothing too gaudy,” I finally squeaked in desperation. Feeling like a tiny replica of my mom. “Classic.”

She harrumphed and harangued and finally agreed, stating she’d write “really plain” in the notes to the cake decorator. “I better take your number though, she’s probably gonna want an explanation.”

Great. Now I’m going to spend my afternoon “explaining myself” to the cake lady.

And I haven’t even got sand in my shoes yet.